2018–2025 · 9 seasons · 1 up / 1 down
Xander Barnard
“The Bridesmaid”
Second is the first loser.
Teams: Addison & my DUI · California Dreamin · I got Gas but No Brakes · Xanders bolo team · Caught Red Hernandez · Ladies and Edelman · Saving Matt Ryan · Yo Mamma's House
Scouting report
Xander Barnard has played 9 seasons for a 53-70 record and precisely nothing to show anyone.
Owns 1 last-place finish. The bottom of the table has a reserved sign.
Runner-up 1 time without ever closing it out. The league's most reliable silver medallist.
Still hasn't explained 2025, when Josh Allen went out the door to John Parker for Zay Flowers.
1 relegation and promoted 1. Knows every tier's WiFi password.
Auto-generated from real numbers. Take it up with the spreadsheet.
- Titles
- 0
- Record
- 53-70
- Win %
- 43%
- PPG
- 160.8
- Playoffs
- 15-10
- Luck
- -0.88
- Trades
- 11
Trophy cabinet & rap sheet
3 earned · 11 still out of reach.
☠ Bridesmaid
Runner-up, never champion
☠ Glass Cannon
Big points, no trophy
🏆 Ironman
8 straight seasons
🔒 Ring Owner
0 titles
🔒 Dynasty
Three or more titles
🔒 Yo-Yo
2 tier moves — joint most in the league
🔒 Trapdoor Specialist
1 relegation
🔒 Basement Dweller
1 wooden spoon
🔒 Trade Addict
11 trades — league leader
🔒 The Ghost
Career-low waiver activity
🔒 Unluckiest
Luck rating -0.88
🔒 One-Hit Wonder
Exactly one title, nothing else on the podium
🔒 Only Way Is Up
Promoted without ever being relegated
🔒 Veto Victim
0 trades struck down
Nemesis & bunny
Career shape
The climb
Tier by seasonHigher is a higher tier — promotions up, relegations down.
Points per game
You vs the leagueGold is this manager; teal is the league average that season.
Wins by season
Regular seasonGold wins, muted losses.
Season by season
- 2025I got Gas but No BrakesPremiership T16-8 · 2,287 pts · finished 12 · wooden spoon · relegation earned12
- 2024Addison & my DUI▲ promoted into Premiership T18-6 · 2,489 pts · finished 66
- 2023Xanders bolo teamChampionship T28-6 · 2,482 pts · Runner-up2
- 2022California DreaminChampionship T210-4 · 2,412 pts · Third3
- 2022Yo Mamma's HousePremiership T16-8 · 2,077 pts · finished 99
- 2021Yo Mamma's HousePremiership T14-10 · 2,050 pts · finished 1212
- 2020Caught Red HernandezPremiership T16-7 · 1,921 pts · finished 1111
- 2019Ladies and EdelmanPremiership T14-9 · 1,916 pts · finished 1111
- 2018Saving Matt RyanPremiership T11-12 · 2,140 pts · finished 1414
Honours
2023 Championship
Runner-up
2022 Championship
Third
Trade ledger, graded
Grades come from asset volume, premium positions and how the season actually went afterwards. Entirely unofficial, completely binding.
Hall of shame — worst deal
F
2025 with John Parker
Gave Josh Allen · Got Zay Flowers
Hall of shame material.
Best bit of business
B
2022 with Nick Barrett
Gave Corey Davis (WR); Michael Gallup (WR) · Got Terry McLaurin (WR)
Solid bit of business.
- F2025 Premiership · W9 · with John ParkerGot Zay Flowers · Gave Josh AllenHall of shame material.
- C-2024 Premiership · W14 · with Blake HansenGot Rico Dowdle · Gave Jonathan TaylorSlightly fleeced.
- C-2024 Premiership · W15 · with Blake HansenGot T.J. Hockenson · Gave Jalen HurtsSlightly fleeced.
- B2022 Championship · W8 · with Sam TangGot Keenan Allen (WR) · Gave D.J. Moore (WR)Solid bit of business.
- D2022 Championship · W9 · with Silvan RoschGot DeVonta Smith (WR) · Gave Ezekiel Elliott (RB)Rough. Very rough.
- B2022 Championship · W13 · with Sam TangGot Stefon Diggs (WR); D'Andre Swift (RB) · Gave Keenan Allen (WR); DeVonta Smith (WR); Isiah Pacheco (RB)Solid bit of business.
- B2022 Championship · W14 · with Nick BarrettGot Terry McLaurin (WR) · Gave Corey Davis (WR); Michael Gallup (WR)Solid bit of business.
- B2022 Championship · W14 · with Sam TangGot David Montgomery (RB) · Gave Rachaad White (RB)Solid bit of business.
- D2022 Championship · W16 · with Silvan RoschGot Nick Bosa (DL) · Gave DeForest Buckner (DL); Zack Moss (RB)Rough. Very rough.
- B-2022 Championship · W2 · with John ParkerGot Rachaad White (RB) · Gave Marquez Valdes-Scantling (WR)Marginal win.
- D2022 Premiership · W10 · with Lloyd PhillipsGot Dalvin Cook (RB); Michael Gallup (WR) · Gave Deebo Samuel (WR); Antonio Gibson (RB)Rough. Very rough.